Okay, I’ve been looking at blog post after blog post and news item after news item that insist on using the word “mixologist” to describe a person who makes alcoholic drinks. Presumably while doing yoga and tweeting about Oprah. This is sad.
I remember a time when a person who mixed drinks was called – beautifully – a bartender. This noble individual served their vocation with diligence and grace and finesse without resorting to theatrics and parlor tricks to make their point or mix their drinks. They mixed alcoholic beverages with non-alcoholic flavorings to create what were then known as “cocktails” – not sure what they are referred to now as this new smell wafts over the genre. These cool souls kept their cloths wet, their powder dry and the drinks coming. You could assume they had something heavy beneath the bar, just in case, but you never felt threatened. They presided over a mirrored wonderland that probably included a sign somewhere that read “I’m OK and you’re OK if the cheque’s OK”.
Here’s what i do: anytime i hear someone described as a “mixologist”, i simply substitute the word “asshole”. If you want to discuss, i’ll be the guy at the bar. Hopefully, this guy’s bar.