The Bourbon Logs

Aside from drinking that is. Well, i’ve one less thing to worry about, at least for the time being: running is out. Not for lack of trying, and in fact because of trying. I ran myself straight into a knee injury. And the funny thing is that instead of jumping (figuratively) for joy because i no longer need to worry about sticking to the ridiculous 6-days a week running regimen specified by our running book as necessary preparation for the marathon, i felt pissed off. Cheated even. I know, there’s something wrong with me.

It started last week. I went out for a run on Tuesday i think it was, even though i wasn’t feeling well at the time (cold-symptoms). The run was awful, in terms of my chest and it’s ability to pull in oxygen, but i didn’t worry about that too much because the Why was obvious. However, the next day my legs were terribly sore. My left ankle, both calves, and my right knee were all suffering. I thought: well, i can stretch my way out of that.

I took Wednesday off and gave it a shot again on Thursday. My “wind” was much better, but my legs were worse. Every step was pretty much painful. However, i was encouraged with my wind and thought “i’ll stretch my way out of the pain”. Meanwhile walking stairs had become an issue and every sentence was preceeded with a groan. Friday rolled around and i felt that i’d just take the day off. Then things got a little stressful at some point and i decided to give it a go. Drove to Burnaby Lake and did the circuit. Pulled it in in under an hour, but every step was painful. I did some serious stretching at the end and felt i was getting the better of the pain in my calf muscles. However, there was no way to stretch the knee.

Saturday i wrote off, and i did feel much better. Everything felt better. No calf pain; only moderate discomfort at the knee. “I can run myself out of this” i thought. Sunday dawned and i was psychologically prepared for the long run. This week was to be 16kms. I considered doing twice around Burnaby Lake, because i knew i had the stamina for it. I wasn’t sure about the muscles but was willing to challenge them. Rob, my brother, came with me to do the run. He’s training for the marathon as well. As we ran there was pain, but i tried to ignore it. However, things escalated, and the inescapable logic finally cam clear to me. I made it around once, and we were 1 km into the second leg, when i just stopped. “That’s it for me” i said, and limped back to the car.

So now i’m walking with a pronounced limp. THe pain is sharp if i challenge it, and it’s on the inside of the right knee. I’ve been icing it, taking pain-killers, and have made an appointment with a physio-therapist. Perhaps i need orthotics, maybe i need to quit running altogether. Maybe i need to take a lot of time off and then start slow, not drop myself into week three of the marathon training and expect to flourish.

We’ll see. In any case that’s one less thing to do while things fall apart….

OK, maybe that’s a trifle over-stated, maybe not. In any case, i did email my brother today with a link to a piece in the BBC on global warming. Tom, my brother, believes that the central premise of global warming - that human activity is causing the planet to heat up - is false. He believes that all can be explained with reference to “weather cycles”. I love my brother but disagree with him on this point.

But as i wait for the coming Gotterdamerung there are no end of entertainments to keep me from the blues. On Saturday Carly and i took in King Kong on the big screen. I had heard a mixed bag of opinions on this film, and i was keen on taking in the spectacle in person. The verdict: I liked it.

What did i like? Well, i thought the special effects were incredible. I mean where did they find such a large ape to play the lead role anyway? Last time i saw an ape that big he was plotting Reform party election strategy with Stockwell Day. The dinosaurs, the bugs (oh my god the bugs), the ape - all first rate stuff. The penultimate clincher at the top of the Empire State Building was a vertigo-inducing thrill that had me on the edge of my seat and stomach at the same time (i’m a bit ticklish about heights).

And the soul of the story - that a gigantic ape and a pretty blond girl can have a relationship - was handled well. Not that it’s a stretch when a pretty girl and a brute end up together - just look at me and Chris…I think Jackson did well and was able to wring a lot of emotion out of the non-verbal exchanges between the digital ape and Naomi Watts character. Naomi Watts is always a bit of a revelation. I think she’s one of the best. I want her in my movie.

The movie had its shallow points. I thought they overdid the whole Island thing. There was just too much going on: a lost tribe of weird and scary cannibal types (they were at the Reform party meeting too last time i saw them); a wild and silly dinosaur race that reminded me of the pod car race with Anni at the helm in the first and (maybe) worst Star Wars prequel (i thought it gratuitous and unnecessary); unexplained and unnecessary sub-plots involving the hardy ship’s crew; and an incredible display of entomological horror animated with great skill and enmity by Jackson’s gifted studio. The latter scene was awful to watch. If you are in the least bit squeemish about bugs, especially elongated worm-tubers that have foot-long tusks ringing their “mouth” openings and like to swallow people head first, then i suggest you take a powder at the appropriate time.

I thought Jack Black’s performance left a lot to be desired. He was neither funny nor believable. I think he should have been at least one of those things.

All told however it was a fine bit of entertainment and a worthy distraction from “the usual”.

Then there was Battlestar Gallactica’s latest episode, no. 14. A weak episode in our reckoning. It felt too much like filler. Not enough Starbuck and too much Apollo. I can understand Appolo having some issues after his near-death experience, but this seemed an odd way to explore them. Too much “flashback”, not enough real-time for us. And i thought the same thing as mr. zebra: what’s with the “fourty-eight hours earlier” device? Not that i don’t think the premise was all that out-of-whack. What are the odds that all of humanity’s sins would follow it through the apocalypse and beyond?

Ah well…enough of this small talk.

Misnomer really. Post-election is what happens tomorrow. For many it’s accompanied by the hangover that follows a long night of serious partying. When Canada wakes up to a Conservative government in its bed there’ll be some serious sneaking out the back door. It’s Conservative ugly: gnaw your arm off if you have to but get out of the bedroom at any cost.

I find it depressing. A party and Prime Minister who supported the war in Iraq, who chastised his own country for opting out of the “Coalition of the Willing”, whose position on the environment is a page out taken straight out of the BIG OIL media handbook, who will cut taxes as an underhanded social strategy to undermine the role of government in the economy and reduce the level of services funded by government, but who will have an opportunity to write himself into the Canadian history books. Indeed the Blue Eyed Assasin already has: he is (or soon will be) the Prime Minister.

Mind you the mandate offered to the Conservatives by the Canadian electorate is hardly a ringing endorsement of their platform. The Liberal’s ran this race with cement shoes and the best the Conservatives could do was to nose them out at the wire? I’m shocked really. After 8 long years of Mulroney the right was left with two seats in the House and a moribund future. Anyone remember Kim Campbell? After 12 years of Liberal government the prospects don’t look too bad - for them. Get a new leader in place, rejig the platform, bring in some new ideas stolen from the other parties (electoral reform/proportional representation, invigorated environmental stance, social equity on the one hand, fiscal balance on the other), and bestride the middle ground like a colossus…who knows?

And speaking of the Liberals, Paul Martin wasted no time didn’t he? Fell on his sword like a good soldier. Well, he had his chance, and failed to deliver. I think he failed in his resolve. He didn’t lead. He needed to act decisively and didn’t: on parlimentary reform, on Kyoto, on Foreign Aid. He didn’t follow through on his own stated goals. Mind you he was handed a large and steaming bag of shit from his former boss, a bag of shit that he couldn’t leave on anyone else’s doorstep, because we were all watching. I don’t think Jesus could have won for the Liberals under those circumstances.

I’m somewhat disappointed with the showing of the Green party. No seats - again, and no demonstrable impact on the campaign. I haven’t been able to find out how their popular vote compared to last time, but I don’t think it increased. I don’t know how the Greens will move from where they are to where they need to be, but I do hope it happens. Problem is there are simply too many parties. And the majority on the left of the spectrum. That’s one thing that could make being conservative easier in the coming years. Kind of the reverse of the situation where the rivalry between the Reform Party and the Progressive Conservatives ensured a mediocre Chretien government could stay in power. I’ve often thought that the Green party would overtake the NDP as the party of choice for the left. I for one am more likely to vote Green than NDP; in fact I’ve voted Green in two federal elections and never NDP. However, a competent Jack Layton has brought the NDP back from the brink. I still say the tide of history will favor the Greens however….

It’s going to get interesting, methinks. Stephen Harper will either be true to his word or true to his stripe, and whatever way he turns could lead to gold or lead, depending on the breaks. On the one hand, he can deliver to the constituency that brought him to his current position: the Bush style conservatives, Oil, family values, lower taxes (reduced services), more military, more punishment and less justice. In doing so he may succeed or he may fail, electorally speaking. It depends on how she plays out….For what it’s worth, i believe this will be a mistake. The world has tried the “American experiment” and the thing blew up in the lab (trouble is, the lab is the world…). On the other hand, he can try to stay in power and act more like a Red Tory, like a new-age Joe Clark. He can wear a face that is centrist enough to steal votes from the Liberals, and maybe even resurrect the old Mulroney alliance from below ground in Quebec and roll those dice again? In that case he might have a bit of a run.

However it turns out, i’m glad i’ve got an early start on him. I’ve been training for the Vancouver marathon in May. It will be my first (and probably last) marathon. Not suprisingly, the training involves a lot of running, a skill which may serve me well over the near term. In the next few years there could well be some things coming down that i will need to run from, and quickly. In the meantime, the glass is empty. Time for a refill….

Have you ever listened to Stephen Harper? Not to the words i mean, but his manner of public speaking? He has an interesting style, at least in the clips that clang between classical music selections on CBC Radio Two when it’s time for our hourly dose of medicine/news. He seems to stress every second word, so you get this sing-song alliteration as he delivers his stultifying Neo-conservative message. It’s like he’s attempting to LULL us INTO a FALSE sense of SECURITY as HE speaks. Something like…

If ELECTED we’ll DO AWAY with this NEVER ENDING system of PRIVILEGE and POSITION and REPLACE them with GOOD old FASHIONED family VALUES restoring the MILITARY and contributing to the WAR ON TERROR. We’ll end CORRUPTION once and for all BECAUSE you can TRUST US. we BELIEVE in TRUTH, justice, and that GLOBAL WARMING is a dirty COMMIE lie. WE’LL support FAMILIES so that WOMEN can stay HOME where we believe CANADIANS (except for QUEBECKERS) believe they REALLY belong. ABOVE all YOU should VOTE for US because WE’RE not the LIBERALS. Thank YOU very MUCH.

This sing-song patter has me wondering what song he and George W would sing together. I’m thinking of one of the most embarassing moments in Canadian political history when Brian Mulroney and Ronald Reagan put in a rendition of “When Irish Eyes are Smiling” to celebrate their incestuous relationship and the American patriation of the Canadian economic system. I’m thinking George on banjo, Harper on mouth-organ, doing a bad rendition of Steve Earle’s I’m Just a Regular Guy. I’m picturing George riding Harper bareback as they perform, a’la Brokeback Mountain. As I picture this I realise that I need to focus on the fact that the news is over and I can return to my regular listening stance.

Chinaski, over and out….

I’ve been listening to CBC Radio 2 almost exclusively of late when I’m listening to radio at all, and the main reason is i can’t stand hearing about the election. I have more or less abdicated any active participation in this thing, partly because…well let’s just say BECAUSE!

Because i’ve been busy trimming my nails.
Because the dog needs a walk.
Because my bourbon needs a refill.
Because of all the good tv on basic cable.
Because aliens abducted me and put me up at a luxury hotel.
Because i’ve been working on my version of the unified field theory. I’m about an ounce and half off in my calculations. Scuse me while i top up.
Because the world isn’t round, or did you not get that memo?
BECAUSE STEPHEN HARPER IS A BLUE-EYED SMILING ASSASIN WHO WILL WALK US DOWN A CONSERVATIVE PATH THAT EXPERTS AGREE IS NEITHER LESS FILLING NOR DOES IT TASTE GREAT.

I did tune in to the debate (the third debate), on the radio because i cannot stand to look at these dinks anymore, and i will say this: the Greens once again won. Which is why i’m voting Green instead of turning green.

This blog kills fascists, or at least, gives them a good pillow whipping.

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